


Pony Pals: Incest Adventure

by ScribbleSnapPeas



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Trans Dave Strider, Trans Male Character, Twincest, they go to a brony con and fuck in a hotel room
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-15 11:48:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7221163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScribbleSnapPeas/pseuds/ScribbleSnapPeas
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Striders had minds like steel traps, minds that ran a mile a minute. That was fun in a battle of beats or wits or fists, but late at night it was hell. Dave forced his mind to focus on his body, instead, his legs stretched out along the bed, chest finally free of the constriction of a binder. Dirk's arm was warm and almost electric against his. Christ, that was a gay thought. Neither of them moved at all, Dave rationalizing that a ninja such as himself must practice the art of self-control over both his physical form and his overtly incestuous feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pony Pals: Incest Adventure

Dave had finally agreed to accompany Dirk to this stupid-ass pony convention, follow him around holding his stupid-ass merch, slap down a fat dollar to split the cost of this stupid-ass hotel, and all he got in return was an extra night in stupid-ass Dallas, Texas. Dirk needed to stay late to whinny with his pony pals one last time or what-fucking-ever. At least he had the hotel to himself until his brother came back. Certainly enough time to order pizza and force Flicka-fucker to foot the bill.

By midnight, Dirk had returned from a goodbye round of drinks at a local bar. Dave was already in bed, playing with his phone. He glanced up and gave a little wave before turning his attention back to level 202 of Candy Crush Saga, “Sweet Surprise”. Dirk dropped his bag dramatically by the door to the room, sliding off his shoes and plopping into the bed next to him, causing Dave’s finger to shake and losing him the level. “Fuck, dude, for real?”

“Whoops.” Dirk pulled out his own Galaxy Note 5, rolling over and clicking out the stylus, not comprehending the gravity of Dave’s plight. “Long day. Can’t a man flop down dramatically on his own bed anymore?”

“Fuck you, I pay half the rent on this bed. Are you gonna make me call the landlord again? I swear to God, we’ll put tape halfway down like in Malcolm in the Middle.”

“This is why the kids like me better.”

“Yeah, that’s why Darius got you a fucking TIE for Father’s Day. Dream on, prick.”

“Like a watch is so much better than a tie!”

“That watch cost at least fifty bucks.”

“I found it on Amazon for $19.99.”

Dave snorted, too tired to continue their intensive roleplay banter. “Whatever. My mother was right about you. Now shut up and turn off that light, I have to drive for three and a half hours tomorrow.”

Dirk complied, kissing his cheek facetiously and unbuttoning his jeans, kicking them off and to the side. Dave was already in his boxers and a t-shirt, binder and shorts shoved under the bed to be dealt with in the morning. He pulled the blanket up to his chin and turned over, lowkey taking out his phone again to finish that level. Dirk glared at him and reached around to flick it, setting his own device on the bedside table. “C’mon, sleep. It’s like one in the morning, we’ve gotta be packed up and gone by 10.”

Dave mocked his facial expressions and made gibberish noises, rolling his eyes and flopping his face down into his pillow. “You’re only ten minutes older.” Usually Dirk would make a big scene about he was a million years more mature, but today he just grunted and slid down into the bed. He buried his unshaven face in his pillow and took up far more room on the bed than he had any right to. Dave didn’t bitch about it though, just stayed still, hoping his brother would fall asleep so he could go back to crushing as many candies as he could get his index finger on.

Addiction is a powerful thing.

Striders had minds like steel traps, minds that ran a mile a minute. That was fun in a battle of beats or wits or fists, but late at night it was hell. Dave forced his mind to focus on his body, instead, his legs stretched out along the bed, chest finally free of the constriction of a binder. Dirk's arm was warm and almost electric against his. Christ, that was a gay thought. Neither of them moved at all, Dave rationalizing that a ninja such as himself must practice the art of self-control over both his physical form and his overtly incestuous feelings.

Dirk shifted onto his back, trying to get comfortable, nudging his brother a little as though to push him aside, but actually smushing his bicep right against his face. Hoooooly shit. Dave could feel the heat of his own breath reflected back at him, and he gave a fake annoyed little grumble, carefully lifting his head up and resting it against the soft yet undeniably solid muscle under his head. Dirk didn’t move.

What a good way to get out of his own mind. Touch. Focusing on touch touch touch. Dirk was so warm, breathing so soft, like he was half-asleep already. Neither of them had acknowledged the movements thus far. Maybe he should make a little game of it. Nothing weird about that. Like gay chicken. He slowly brought his hand up to rest his fingers against Dirk’s upper stomach, sliding too slowly to be truly casual. The neurons Dave couldn’t stop from firing wondered what the fuck Dirk was thinking about this. It was obvious he was still awake.

While he was busy parsing this, rough fingers brushed on top of his own, adjusting until Dirk’s palm was covering the back of Dave’s hand. Holy shit. Red eyes flicked open to find shadeless orange ones looking right back at them. They lied there in silence, dead silence. Fast and hard heads were spinning like hamsters on greased wheels. Too fast to make any real sense. Dave leaned in and pressed his nose, mouth against Dirk’s stubbly cheek, lips moving achingly slowly forward until the movement was undeniably a kiss.

There was literally no reason for this. Sexual tension had never plagued their relationship, they’d never experimented together, never even shared porn. Dave was horny right now, yeah, but couldn’t he just excuse himself and go have play with the showerhead or whatever? ‘What the fuck’ flooded his cortex, a mantra, like his neural dendrites were helpful hands and his axons were shoulders, friendly neighbors tapping one another and spreading the good news of intense sexual confusion. They were both three months away from being 18. This was not just immoral, but illegal. The thought made him giggle, breaking whatever tension there was and causing Dirk to crack a little smile.

Dave barely even noticed when cheek turned to lip against his mouth, until Dirk went in for a real kiss. How bold. The romantic/sexual connotation thus far could have been a figment of Dave’s imagination. This was the tipping point Without his direct consent, his hand came up to slide into Dirk’s hair, the gel mostly worked out of it from wearing his Rainbow Dash hoodie. Then Dirk’s hand was on his back, then their clothed chests were pressed together, then their legs were tangled up and then, and then, they were really truly completely making out. Somebody parted their lips and somebody else slid their tongue inside, identical twins with near-identical lips and tongues and teeth clashing them together, nibbling and kissing and sucking just a little, breath coming fast through their noses until they pulled away for air, almost simultaneously, like those telepathic twin connections on daytime television were a real thing.

Even if they weren’t, Dave knew Dirk was crunching numbers like he always did when he was nervous. Any numbers he saw or remembered, he’d figure out the multiples, the greatest common denominator, what they added divided multiplied subtracted up to. Dave kissed him again, and tried to speak, but had to clear his throat first. “Are you okay…?”

Such a weird and vague way to ask for consent, but to his relief, Dirk nodded, pulling him closer and kissing him again. Dave’s free hand, despite his arm being crushed under himself, reached the bottom of Dirk’s shirt and slid up under it, against the flat plane of his barely-defined abs, feeling his own stomach through the cotton on the back of his hand. Dirk took the hint request and pulled away to tug his own shirt off awkwardly, getting his elbow stuck. He wasn’t used to removing it lying down. Dave smiled a little and immediately moved forward so fast it was almost a lunge, kissing the newly exposed skin like he was trying to prove he wouldn’t let it go to waste.

Conscious thoughts snapped back into the picture when Dirk tugged hurriedly on Dave’s shirt. He shook his head, uncomfortable, covering his chest with an arm. Genuine apology flicked across Dirk’s face and he kissed his forehead, then his nose, sliding a hand down his back. “Sorry. You don’t gotta, just- uh. I like… what you have going on, even if you don’t. Not that I wouldn’t like however you were, if you were how you wanted to be-” Dave kissed him hard to shut him up, nipping at his bottom lip and sliding out of his own boxers to compensate.

“Shhh.” He murmured into his ear, pressing their cheeks together and making sure Dirk could feel him removing his own underwear. He handed it to him and Dirk pressed it to his chest like something precious before dropping it on the floor, then using the same hand to slide down his back to his exposed ass.

“This alright?” Dave nodded, clearing his throat. “The- front is okay, too.” Yikes. What an awkward and childish way to name his own genitals. He tried to make up for it, muttering “My pussy.” That was even worse, holy shit. His chest clenched and his face got red, a little mortified shake showing up in his hands. Dirk’s eyebrows raised and he obediently moved his hand, cupping Dave’s crotch without going past his outer lips.

“Your pussy.”

“Don’t be a douche.”

Dirk seemed genuinely hurt for a second, taking his hand away. “Wasn’t complaining, dude.”

He slipped a hand around his wrist and placed the hand back where it was. “Do you… like pussy, then?”

One shoulder shrugged, and Dirk ran a careful thumb over where the hood of his clit just barely poked out, observing stoically the little sigh Dave released. “That’s a dumb question. I like what I like. Labels ain’t useful in this context. I like you.”

God, the way his drawl slid out when he wasn’t focused on it was hot. “Color me enlightened. Maybe you should act on those unarticulated feelings about my pussy.”

“Well you didn’t ask how I felt about YOUR pussy, now did you, darlin’.” Darlin’. Holy shit. Dirk seemed to catch the slip of the tongue, and he cleared his throat, like he could pretend it was some sort of weirdly clear cough. “I happen to dig that particular pussy.” As if to prove it, he slid a finger into Dave’s outer labia, drawing it slowly from the bottom of his vulva to the top of his clit.

“You don’t say.” He breathed, wrapping his arm around Dirk and resting his face in the place where his shoulder met his neck, lifting up a leg so that the flat of his foot was on the bed, inhaling more sharply than he meant to when that accidentally caused the pad of Dirk’s middle finger to slip into him like it was meant to be there. Dirk’s breath caught and he froze, letting Dave carefully push his hips down until the whole tip of finger was inside.

There was a pause, and just when Dave was starting to get irritated, he felt Dirk’s chest rumble against him. “Do you want me to finger you?”

“Does it feel like I want you to finger me?”

“Does it feel like I’m going to go any further without your verbal consent?”

He had a point, and Dave sighed, pulling back and cupping his face. “You have my full permission to finger the everloving shit out of me, captain. We’re cleared for takeoff. You’re going where no man has gone before. Bring back some rocks.” Dirk gave a full-out bark of laughter at that, sliding his finger a little further in and feeling along the front wall of his vagina until he came to what was very, very evidently the g-spot. Dave’s legs opened even further and pressed against him, and he barely even noticed when Dirk pressed another finger in.

“Should I be using lube? Maybe I should go wash my hands first, I just had some candy and I’m pretty sure that’s how yeast infections happen.” If looks could kill, Dirk would be splattered and fried like a germaphobic egg.

“Are you seriously thinking about hand sanitizer while you’re fingering me, holy shit. No, we don’t need lube, nature stuck a bottle of KY right up in me.” That was not a sexy allusion, but Dirk got the point, pushing the fingers in and pressing them right where Dave wanted them. His grip tightened and he closed his eyes, hips rocking back and forth and back again. Little waves of pleasure spread from Dirk’s fingers up his spine, out to his arms and legs, down to his toes. Being fingered was apparently a fucking spiritual experience. His head tipped back and he could feel Dirk kissing his thinly veiled vocal cords and veins. This was vulnerable as shit, both physically and emotionally.

When he opened his eyes again he cupped Dirk’s face, looking into his eyes like this was some sort of bullshit romantic movie and this symbolized their true love. In all honesty, he just wanted to make sure Dirk was listening to him. “Use your thumb and rub against my clit, alright? It’s up at the top- nnnOPE,” He should have been more clear, but it was hard as fuck to think when Dirk was two fingers deep and almost knew how to use them. “From the top, it hurts if you go from the bottom, ‘cause you get like… under the… just fucking do it?” An embarrassingly uninhibited noise flew out of him when Dirk got it, and he nodded vigorously. “Right there. Just like that. I like it in little circles- press down a little more.”

“So demanding, sugar. You payin’ me for this?” He teased, following Dave’s instructions with a little flourish of his own, pulling away just a little and stimulating both spots in time with one another.

“You’ll get yours, fucker.” Dave slapped weakly at his wrist, pulling his hips away. In porn Dirk would probably lick his fingers, but… holy shit. He was actually doing it. Dave chuckled at the cliché move, but leaned in for a kiss anyway. “I’m a gentleman, after all. I wouldn’t leave you hanging.” With a little struggling, he tugged his boxers down, and laughed aloud when his cock sprung up like a jack-in-the-box. It took several seconds for him to calm down, and Dirk just smirked at him until he was done, raising his eyebrows.

“You’re mean. Dicks may be hilari- oh.” Dave had leaned down and licked a stripe from the base to the tip, giving a cute little kiss on the top.

“I like your dick.” Another kiss, a wetter one, all over the head. “Your cock.”

Dirk had to concur. “You can call it whatever you want, long as you don’t stop doin’ that.” Dave didn’t stop doin’ that, letting his tongue loll out and wipe under the curve of his head, licking his hand messily and wrapping it around the shaft. He wasn’t an expert, but he was no rookie, either. His oral style was more about looks than sensation, at least at first. He batted his eyelashes all pretty and gave innocent kisses up and down the large vein on the underside of his cock, using a finger to dab at the precum and then lick it off, then taking the head into his mouth as if he’d decided he liked it.

“Holy shit.” Dirk put a hand on the back of his head, and Dave immediately swatted it off, glaring.

“No way, Jose. You want a BJ, you play by Dave’s BJ Rules. I’ll draw up a chart when your dick isn’t in my mouth.” Dirk squinted down at him. Was this gonna happen again? The question lingered in both of their minds, at least until Dave sunk down to take his cock halfway into his mouth. He got a little more into the act now, making a little gagging noise and sucking on it, making sure to keep his teeth from coming down hard. Dirk tipped his head back and felt his heart skip a beat, trying hard to keep his hands from breaking Dave’s ambiguous ten commandments of oral sex.

Dave knew all the right moves. Licking under his frenulum then all the way around, sucking on the base, looking up at him and making little noises, wriggling like he wanted to touch himself. Good shit. With a wet ‘pop’ he removed his mouth, wiping it with the back of his hand, forcing nonchalance. “So are you gonna f...fuck me or what?” His voice shook in the middle of the sentence, revealing that this perhaps wasn’t as simple as he wanted it to be. Dave lowered his forehead onto his thigh, cursing quietly.

More silence. Dirk looked down at his dick as though it would argue with him, beg him to slide the fuck into the holiest of holes. He looked back up to Dave and gave a hesitant nod. “... Condoms?”

“Testosterone supplements prevent pregnancy, I’m pretty sure. And I’m clean, I got tested like… a month ago, haven’t got any since then.”

“Pretty sure? Is pretty sure gonna cut it when we have weird incest babies with 8 toes and no eyelids? I use condoms consistently, because I’m responsible.”

“Sooooo… that means you’re clean.”

“Dave.”

“I’ll use plan B!”

After another pleading look down at his dick, he gave an exasperated nod. Dave frowned, feeling guilty.

“Hey, no, I can get some condoms. I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable, for real.” Dirk put a hand on his arm to soothe him, shaking his head.

“No, trust me. As long as you take the plan B we’re good, I swear.” It didn’t take much to convince Dave, and he grinned, whipping a leg over to straddle him suddenly, holding himself above his dick. Dirk had to force himself not to buck up when he felt the heat of Dave’s vulva sliding against him.

“Hoooly shit. There’s a God, isn’t there, Dave. There must be a God.” Dave laughed, sliding his hips back and forth like this is what he was made for, like he was really divine, like the wetness that was literally starting to drip down Dirk’s dick was ichor and this was a pagan ritual that would launch him up to the heavens, a veritable pussy canon-

Dave slid the tip inside of himself, and Dirk’s hands flew to his hips, gripping hard enough for him to wince. “Holy fuck.” It wasn’t clear to either of them who said it, or who reached first for a kiss and a hug, but suddenly Dirk was sitting up and they were holding each other and Dave was all the way down, shivering and clenching and trying not to move even as Dirk rocked the two of them back and forth, his cock rubbing everywhere, getting deepdownlow, somehow moving his body from the inside.

There wasn’t the exaggerated thrusting of porn, nor the passioned humping of movies. They didn’t even pull out at first. They just rocked together, breathing nonsense words at each other, feeling like their skin was melting and melding into one another. After several seconds they finally gave in to what nature told the birds and the bees, Dave rising up on his knees and sliding down again, just a few inches of movement that felt like a workout. Dirk halfheartedly helped with the hold on his hips. It was really up to Dave, though, he was the one with the holy grail nestled between his legs. The pleasure rippling from earlier was full-on waves now, crashing on the shore of his chest, curling up his fingers and accepting kisses and hickeys on his throat like raindrops on a pond.

A fumbling and messy hand caught Dirk’s, and he who tried to lace their fingers together before Dave shoved them both downward towards where they were connected. “Clit,” he blurted out, pulling away to look at him imploringly. Dirk got the memo and used the same thumb from earlier to rub him just the way he liked it.

It was like a pot boiling over when he came, bubbles of dopamine clenching him up and pushing drizzles from inside of him, pulsing around Dirk’s cock until he shot off like a champagne bottle. It was like their bodies were beating together, throbbing and shaking through their respective orgasms until Dave pulled off without fanfare, flopping down on his back.

“I cannot. Believe. You came inside.”

Dirk gave a sheepish smile, leaning over to get a tissue and handing it to him. Dave glared at him but leaned down to clean himself out, balling it up when he was done and throwing it at him. Dirk shrieked like a kid and Dave laughed when he was shoved in the arm, laying back down. “Like that’s grosser than having it inside you. Toughen up, buttercup.”

Their smiles both faded after a few moments, Dirk sliding down to lie next to him. There was a gap between their bodies, and they weren’t looking at each other. Dave was a little sore and Dirk’s heartbeat was finally starting to slow down.

Dave’s head turned towards Dirk and took in the silhouette of his face, quickly looking away again as Dirk turned towards him half a second later. Soon his head rolled back, too. Dave’s stomach flitted with uncertainty, and Dirk’s rolled with it. They didn’t touch.

One slept first and the other turned to watch for a few seconds, then looking ashamedly away like there was still a chance of being caught. An uncertain flickering streetlight lulled him to sleep, and behind the darkness of his eyelids, he was alone again in his own room.

**Author's Note:**

> hey if you liked this make sure to click like and subscribe for more videos thanks for watching


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